Wednesday, January 26, 2011

WRITERS ANNONYMOUS

I haven't had anything funny, inspirational, or helpful to say this week. Instead of making up some dribble that no one wants to read (including me) I'm going to share this poem that made me giggle...

Writers Anonymous: A 3 Step Program

[Step One: Resentment]
Hi, My name is Quentin.
I'm a write-a-holic.
I can't control it, can't curb
the urge to write.
I need help.
I want my life back.

[Step Two: Commitment]
I write poems on fast food napkins,
with toothpicks, using ketchup for ink.
I jot ideas for poems
on my arms and legs. When I run out of space,
I use my shoes.
I make motions
similar to Michael Jackson's moonwalk
when I need to erase.

I make up stories
while making love to my wife.
She left me. Who needs her?
She was suffocating my creativity.

I await submission replies
like an addict, hands trembling,
head shaking in disbelief.
Not another bout with rejection!
I'm manic depressive.
I'm happy to be here.
No I'm not.

I live for revision.
Instead of sex, I have poems.
I eat feedback.

[Step 3: Contentment]
As a recovering write-a-holic,
admitting my problem
has provided a much needed catharsis.
Joining this nurturing group has

(Excuse me,
but are you going to throw away that paper cup?
That's good paper!)

taught me to reconcile my past
and move forward.

~
Quentin Huff

Moonwalking to erase. That's brilliant in my opinion. ;)

36 comments:

  1. That's hiliarious! Fortunately I haven't done the same during sex, maybe afterwards, just don't tell my husband that. :)

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  2. Hi Karen- I like your style! So I am passing on the "Stylish Blogger Award" to you. You can collect it off my site if you'd like. Have a great day!

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  3. Haha. The problem with Writers' Annonymous is that no one would show up. Or they would and critique or discuss plot holes or something instead.

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  4. LOL!
    "Who needs her?
    She was suffocating my creativity."

    NIce.

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  5. I must say, I usually don't like poems. Not so with this one. Thanks

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  6. Your comments on my blog were inspired!

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  7. Love it thats positively amazing!

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  8. I'm so looking into moonwalking as a form of erasing!! This was such a cool thing. I'm thinking of doing my own now!

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  9. Too fun! My favorite: "That's good paper!"

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  10. This is so cute and awesome! Thanks Karen!

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  11. Tee hee, the moonwalking part was hilarious. I was sitting at my computer in the library bursting into giggles. Thanks for brightening my day. x

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  12. Haha. Great poem. And very true!

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  13. That was funny! I wanna try the ketchup and toothpick thing :P

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  14. I would be climbing over Quentin in that meeting to grab that paper cup before he laid his hands on it!! I have a loose bits of paper fetish. I have shoe boxes full of used envelopes and ATM bank stubs and napkins with ideas and scribbles all over them. The ATM Bank stubs are the hardest to write on because the paper is slippery, like old fashioned fax paper. I get annoyed when the phone company puts a whole bunch of ads on its envelopes. "Where, pray tell, am I suppose to write my next prize-winning essay?" Apparently, I'm quite the expert when it comes to assessing the quality and texture of wasted paper. - G

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  15. That's awesome! Thanks for sharing.

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  16. Thank you for making me laugh Karen. this is too funny... I loved it! By the way I like the new blog look, though it might be new to me :)

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  17. thats awesome,lol! new follower just stopping by, love ur blog! i'd love it if u would follow me back at www.sabaawesome.blogspot.com. thanks!

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  18. Love this post! I'm blog hopping today and I found your wonderful blog. I'm following you now. Wishing you happiness, Katherine

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  19. Hehe. Actually I'm not sure if I should laugh or cry because it's so true. Maybe both. ;)

    I hope all is well with you, your writing...and your big puppy.

    Hugs,
    Lola

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  20. LOL! You have to love that. Especially the paper cup thing!

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  21. Thank you for sharing that with us. I love it.

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  22. When do we meet? Love the sass and directness ... highlights like papercup, moonwalk, eating feedback brings it home ... Good, Fun stuff throughout!
    LeeLee

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  23. Greetings from Southern California :-)

    I added myself to follow your blog. You are more than welcome to visit mine and become a follower if you want to.

    God Bless You, ~Ron

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  24. Ha ha. So true.

    Have a great weekend.

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  25. The only part of the poem that simply isn't true is that feeling compelled to write is a problem--are am I simply in denial?!

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  26. That is friggin' awesome! Luv it. The sad thing . . . I can relate (my husband has chosen to stick around though, so that's a good thing) but otherwise me and the poem are like this *insert crossed fingers*

    Thanks for sharing your blog.

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  27. TOO funny! Thanks for putting a smile on my face today!

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